The Unexpected Encore

January 19, 2011 at 2:55 am (Uncategorized)

So my shocking, worst day so far with Baby J culminated in a trip to the hospital last night, where they eventually decided to admit us overnight – mainly in the better-safe-than-sorry vein. Looks like he has reflux, and that we’ll be going home shortly with medication, but after 12 straight hours of screaming yesterday, I was pretty happy to check in with the professionals.

His red-faced, high-pitched distress yesterday really broke my spirit in the end, and I actually sobbed for the first time since his birth, helplessly rocking him, nothing at all working, both of us covered in vomit and tears. I think being a communicator by nature and profession made my inability to alleviate whatever ailed him so much more acute, and I felt like a total failure. In one of my innumerable and ill-fated attempts to settle him yesterday, I was even bullied off the grass across the road by a really menacing, scary motherfucker black crow. It was really not my day.

And it seems Baby J really objects to our seeing things at the Sydney Opera House – this is the second time in a row he’s landed us in hospital on the eve of a performance we were due to attend. Tonight was going to be our first tilt at leaving him with a babysitter – his eminently capable auntie – so we could see John Malkovich’s Sydney Festival opera (Llew’s anniversary gift to me), but now Auntie is going in our place. The first time Baby J nixed the night out was the start of his early arrival, and, now as then, we really don’t care, just so long as the kid is all right. I think we all know who’s on centre stage now.

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6 Comments

  1. Lilian Nattel said,

    (((((Di and baby))))))

  2. litlove said,

    Oh oh oh those awful scary early newborn days. It’s probably just because he was so premature – I have vivid memories of one of the nurses saying both her babies were born at 34 weeks without properly formed sphincter muscles in the throat, and they had to be sat up after each feed for hours at a time (she was at the end of her tether too, but by the time she told me about it she could laugh – just!). But poor you, Di, and poor Llew and baby J. He’ll be fine and this will pass but it is just so awful while it’s happening. Puts all other stresses in the past into perspective, doesn’t it! I found the acquisition of language to be a wonderful thing. Actually, long before that, I found the sitting up to be a wonderful thing – cures all manner of digestive disorders. Take care of yourself – the anxious moments are very draining.

  3. charlotteotter said,

    I am sorry to hear that Baby J and you are suffering. The first three months can be so difficult. My first was colicky (not nearly as bad as reflux, I know) but we had an eight week period of nightly screaming that lasted anything between three and six hours. It’s plain shattering. I survived by sleeping when she slept and letting everything else slide.

    Big hugs.

  4. Grad said,

    I am so sorry and empathize 100%. We had to rush infant Charlie to Children’s Hospital in downtown Chicago for a similar problem. And I’ve already mentined Katharine’s collic. They scare the snot out of us, our kids do. And then they turn 16 and want a drivers license. Well, I hope you are getting some rest and that Baby J is feeling much better by now. Good karma coming your way.

  5. Norwichrocks said,

    Good lord, Di, it sounds like the kind of day that would try the patience of a saint. Poor little bub. I hope the medication helps and that you’re both able to feed and rest now.

    I’m off to see John Malkovich in the Giacomo Variations tonight and I’m hugely looking forward to it but you’re right, a little baby of your own still beats the Opera House no matter who’s performing.

    {{{hugs}}}

  6. bakersdaughterwrites said,

    I know this isn’t really an appropriate response to what you just wrote, but I wanted to say congratulations! I have been a bit out of the blogging world lately and this is the first time I’ve stopped by since Christmas. I hope that things calm down a bit for you and baby J (and the heat subsides) so you can both get some rest.

    PS. And don’t worry – I’ve heard the Giacomo’s a bit overrated anyway!

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